


Breathe Out

by thegalrahobbitofplantetgalilfrey



Series: Breathe [3]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Asthma, Asthma attack, Fluff, Gen, Keith trying to be independent all of the time, suffocation
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-09-20
Packaged: 2020-03-30 03:53:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19034233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegalrahobbitofplantetgalilfrey/pseuds/thegalrahobbitofplantetgalilfrey
Summary: Shiro’s head whipped around to where Keith lay. Keith was wheezing in a gasping breath, barely able to get enough air.Shiro’s heart dropped to his shoes. How could he have forgotten?!AU where everything is the same, except Keith has asthma.





	1. Cold Truth

Keith watched Pidge and Shiro debate whether or not to rescue the prisoners, his finger twitching on his bayard handle. They didn’t have _time_ for this! They were supposed to be getting the red lion and getting out! Shiro needed to tell Pidge to stop arguing and just come along!

“I’m coming with you,” Shiro said finally, and Keith snapped up. Pidge looked equally surprised.

“What?!”

“I remember where the prisoners are held. Keith, you go find the red lion.”

Keith’s mind reeled. No. Nope. This wasn’t how it was supposed to go! “By myself?”

“Minor change of plans. You’ll be fine.” Shiro put a hand on his shoulder. “Just remember. Patience yields focus.”

Shiro and Pidge ran off down the hallway, leaving Keith to his own devices. Fine. That was _fine_. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been doing everything by himself anyway ever since the Garrison gave him the boot. It wasn’t like he’d started hoping when Shiro showed up that maybe, _maybe_ , he wouldn’t _have_ to do everything himself. Nope. It was _fine_. Everything was _just fine_.

Keith broke off at a steady pace down the hallways, a nagging pit of worry settling in his stomach. What if he couldn’t find the lion?

Lance had said it would be easy, that the lion would call to him. But then, Keith had apparently been _wandering around on top of_ a lion for who knew how long without ever finding a way to it. Maybe the same thing would happen here. Maybe he’d end up wandering around for hours, trying to find the stupid thing.

Keith came to a halt in front of a giant glowing insignia. That looked horribly familiar. He shook his head. He could find this. He just had to keep going. He’d find it eventually, wouldn’t he? He started running again, his breath starting to hitch in his chest.

 _No. Not now, definitely not now. I don’t have the **time** for this, go away_!

The tightness in his chest didn’t go away.

Xxx

Allura put her hands on the Castle controls. “Particle barrier, up!”

Outside, the barrier started to pull up, then abruptly fizzled out. Coran blinked.

“Is that what’s supposed to happen?”

Allura opened a maintenance hatch, peering inside. One of the crystals was out of its place, fallen on its side. “All of the barrier crystals are out of alignment! We have to fix it immediately: without the particle barrier, we’ll be defenseless!”

Coran knelt down next to her, also looking in at the crystals. “We’re both too big.”

“What can we do?!” Allura heard a chittering squeaking noise, and her pet mice came running through, jumping into the maintenance hatch. “The mice!”

They ran and started to push at the fallen crystal, trying to shove it back into place. Coran frowned.

“How do they know how to do this?”

Allura gave her pets a fond smile. “I can hear them talking to me. I think our minds are connected! It must be from sharing the pod for ten thousand years.”

The biggest of her mice body-slammed the fallen crystal, and it snapped back into place, the barrier humming up around the castle. Allura held out her hand, and the mice scrambled out, hopping up onto a control panel.

“Thank you, friends.” She turned to see a grunting, straining Coran, who had his fingers to his temples. “Coran, what are you doing?”

“I’m trying to get them to make me a sandwich.”

Allura frowned, then something else popped up in her mind. “Coran, did you think anything was… strange… about our new red paladin?”

“They all seemed strange to me, princess. I mean, have you seen their ears?”

“No, no, not that- although the rounded tips of their ears _are_ rather odd. I thought… he seemed different from the other Earth-dwellers. There was something…” She frowned. “I thought I heard something strange.”

“Was it something that Lance said?”

“No, no, and it wasn’t something Keith said, either it was just…”

Coran frowned. “Come to think of it, I heard something too—I think it was the way he was breathing.”

Allura jumped on the revelation with relief. “Yes! That’s it! It was strange, it kind of…”

“It kind of stuck in his throat,” Coran finished, “Like it didn’t go down to his lungs properly. I thought it must not be unusual, because the other Earthens didn’t respond to it, but perhaps…”

“Perhaps their silly rounded ears just can’t hear it.” Allura cast a worried look up at the spaceship in Arus’ upper atmosphere. “I hope he’s alright.”

“Shiro and Pidge were with him,” Coran said cheerfully, “I’m certain they’ll make sure he’s not in any danger.”

Xxx

Keith raced through the hallways, stopping as he reached a giant, glowing insignia. He had _definitely_ been here before. He groaned.

“You have _got_ to be _kidding_ me!” He rubbed at his chest, reaching for pockets that were no longer there—that was right, he’d left his belt and jacket back at the castle. With his inhaler still inside his jacket pocket. _Quiznek_. He took in a deep breath, trying to steady himself. He just had to find the red lion, and get back to the castle fast. He took another deep breath, closing his eyes.

“Patience… yields… focus.”

A series of images flashed through his mind, hallways, turns, hallways, the insignia in front of him, and finally, a mechanical lion colored red. He opened his eyes with a grin.

“Gotcha.”

Keith bolted through the hallways, new energy flowing through him now that he knew where he was going. He almost forgot about the tight feeling in his chest.

But it still pressed on him, reminding him that it was there.

His footsteps pounded through the halls, and he finally came to the big door that he knew that the red lion was behind. He opened it, and there it was, staring majestically down at him from a barrier similar to the one that had been around the blue lion—although this one was appropriately red.

“Bingo.” He put a hand on it, expecting it to melt away like the blue lion’s barrier had for Lance. “Let’s get out of here.” Preferably _before_ he collapsed in a wheezing ball on the floor.

The barrier didn’t budge. He frowned. “Open up.” The barrier remained stubbornly closed. Keith tilted his head to the side. “It’s me. Keith.” Maybe the lion was just confused from protecting itself from the Galra for so long. “Your buddy.” He frowned. Time to try again.

“It’s me! Keith, your—” oh, for stars’ sakes! “I—am—your—paladin!”

The lion seemed unimpressed.

“Hey! Come on! We’re connected!” So much for space mumbo-jumbo energies.

The door hissed open, and a couple of sentries pointed gun-things at him and the lion. Keith activated his bayard, wondering how long he could hold them off before he finally ceased being able to breathe. “You’re not getting this lion!”

Some small part of his brain rolled its eyes and pointed out that _technically_ , they already _had_ the lion, but Keith ignored that small part, because this was _his_ lion, whether it knew it yet or not. The sentries opened fire, and Keith ducked behind a control panel. He glanced at it. Airlock doors.

 _Bad idea. Very bad idea_.

Keith activated his face mask and slammed his hand down on the airlock, holding onto the control for dear life as the vacuum of space sucked the robot sentries out, tugging on Keith as well. Keith reached for the controls, trying to close the doors, but something flying out of the cargo hold smacked his hand away, and something else slammed down on the hand still attached to the panel.

Keith let go instinctively and fell with a scream out into open space. His eyes flicked around wildly as he spun, hoping for a way out, but he couldn’t see anything except the vast expanse of space, nothing but blackness and bright stars.

“Ah—ah—”

 _I’m nothing, compared to all of this. Tiny, insignificant. Just a small blip, floating out in the middle of nowhere_.

Keith felt his chest seem to tighten even more as he screamed out the last of the air in his lungs, and he struggled to replace it, but nothing seemed to be coming in, it was like one of those sentries was _sitting on his chest_ , and he couldn’t get rid of it—

Some kind of energy flowed through him as he heard a roar, and his chest loosened, as if something had snatched away whatever had been holding him back. He saw the huge red lion flying towards him, mouth open, and then he was in a chair, sliding up to controls that fit to his hands like they’d been made for him. Keith grinned.

“Good kitty. Let’s roll.”

The four lions sailed back down to Arus, sliding neatly in front of the sealed hangar of the black lion. The paladins all glanced at each other. What was supposed to happen now?

Then, in unison, the lions all roared, and the hangar doors opened, revealing a lion bigger than all of the other lions. It roared as well, and all of the paladins cheered, grinning at Shiro, who looked incredibly startled, as if he couldn’t believe that this was happening.

Then an alarm went off, and they all glanced at each other, before running back to their lions. They could take care of this.

They were paladins

Xxx

“It’s been an honor flying with you, boys?” Lance mimicked as they walked back through the Castle, the Galra cruiser wreckage in the sky, “How many movies have you been watching, mullet-head?”

Keith shot him a glare. “At least _I_ wasn’t screeching that we were all going to die!”

“I wasn’t either!”

“You screamed ‘this is it’! That’s basically screaming that we’re going to die!”

Lance turned his nose up. “Maybe I meant that this was the moment that we’d form Voltron, _Keith_. Maybe I could feel the energy because _I’m_ more attuned to it than _you_.”

“Yeah, keep dreaming! You wouldn’t have even found the lion if I hadn’t brought you to that cave! You couldn’t even sense it when you were standing on top of it!”

“Hippie energy boy!”

“Airplane roadkill!”

“Washout!”

“Human hazard!”

“Mullet-head!”

“That’s enough,” Shiro scolded, “Keith, Lance, stop fighting. I understand that we’re all tired after that battle.”

 ** _Lance_** _has enough energy to **argue**_ , Keith thought mutinously, but didn’t say anything.

“And I understand that we’re all a little bit tense and anxious after forming Voltron. But we can’t just start fighting each other.”

 _It’s not **fighting**. It’s me **winning**_. After all, _Lance_ had been the first to resort to name-calling. But Keith didn’t think Shiro would take that excuse.

“Allura said that she’d put our things in the bedrooms. Lance, this one is yours, and the one across the hallway is Hunk’s. Keith, you and I have the next set, and Pidge, you’re right next to me.” Shiro smiled, a tired, pleased smile. “You guys were great out there. We’re going to be a good team. Everybody get some sleep—who knows what might happen tomorrow.”

Hunk looked like he might be sick, thinking of what might happen tomorrow, but he went to his room without making a comment.

The door to Keith’s room opened with a _hiss_ , and Keith murmured a goodnight to Shiro before going straight to his jacket, searching through the pockets. There was nothing there.

Keith’s veins turned to ice, and he turned the pockets inside out, opening up all of his belt pouches and searching through those, too. But his inhaler wasn’t in either of those pockets either.

Had it fallen out of the pocket when Allura had been moving it? No, she’d have noticed it—even if not initially, she would have seen fairly quickly the object that didn’t belong in her castle.

Then where had it _gone_?! He’d had it when he’d left the hoverbike to start walking in the caves- he remembered its weight in his pocket.

Then it hit him. The waterslide. The fall. The inhaler must have fallen out of his pocket when the cave floor had crumbled. And he hadn’t noticed it because, well, why should he? He’d been looking at a real-life alien mechanical blue lion! The missing weight of an inhaler from his pocket had faded to the background.

 _Quiznek_.

If today had been any indicator, he was going to need that inhaler. Shiro wouldn’t still have his spare one, would he?

Who was he kidding, Shiro didn’t even have his own _memories_. Keith shook his head. It was up to him. If he told any of the others, they’d probably throw him off of Voltron—and maybe the red lion would decide that it didn’t want him after all. None of them knew already except maybe Shiro, so it shouldn’t be hard to hide. All he had to do was keep himself from having an attack. He’d just have to be careful and avoid his triggers.

Keith blew out a quick sigh, hanging his jacket back up and straightening his belt. He pulled off the paladin armor and the surprisingly light-fabric of the flight suit, slipping back into his familiar jeans and T-shirt. It felt better to wear them, to remind himself of Earth. His inhaler was back on earth, light-years away if the completely different constellations were anything to judge by.

 _Well, this isn’t going to be fun_.


	2. Deal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, if you're new to the series, and are starting with this work, you don't really have to read the other works for this one to make sense. I hope. I'll let you know if that changes. You guys can go on to the chapter. Those of you who are coming in after reading my last two works: chronologically, this is after Breathe In. Breathe in has happened, but aside from some fixed points of time, we're just not going to talk about it in Breathe Out because that's better left to short angst one-shots. Okay, now that everyone is thoroughly confused, you can read the chapter.

Shiro froze as the gladiator bot Allura had sicced on them stomped towards him. Gladiator…

Purple light

Sand stained crimson.

A metal weapon in his hand.

A grunt and a clang snapped him back in place. Keith had jumped in front of him, taking the gladiator’s staff on his sword. He let out a puff of breath, straining to hold it off, and then it brought its staff back, slamming it into Keith’s chest and shoving both him and Shiro away. It hovered over both of them and then powered down, Allura behind it and glaring at the fallen paladins.

“That combat simulator was set at a level fit for an Altean _child_! You’re not even close to working as a _team_ , let alone ready to face Zarkon!” Her irritated gaze slid over to Keith. “And what’s wrong with _him_?”

Shiro’s head whipped around to where Keith lay. Keith was wheezing in a gasping breath, barely able to get enough air.

Shiro’s heart dropped to his shoes. _How could I have forgotten?! I’m actually the worst black paladin—the worst **friend** ever_!

He scrambled to Keith’s side as the other paladins closed in and he ripped off Keith’s helmet, sitting him upright. His breathing eased at that, but not much.

“Keith, buddy, where is it? Do you have it on you?”

Keith let out another wheeze and shook his head.

“Is it in your jacket?”

Another shake.

Shiro felt a bubble of panic rise up in his stomach. “Is it even on the castle?”

One more shake.

“What’s going on?” Lance whispered. Pidge shushed him.

“It’s back on Earth?”

A nod.

Shiro lifted Keith up. “Allura, is there anything in the castle that can make medicine?”

“Y-yeees, in the med bay—if we input the chemicals necessary, or the medicine name if—”

“That’s all I need, take me to it. Pidge, Hunk, do you think you could make an inhaler?”

Pidge and Hunk both blinked at him. “You mean… like an asthma inhaler?” Pidge ventured.

“Yes.”

They glanced at each other. “Yeah… probably…”

“Great, get on that. Coran, for now, do you have, like, an oxygen mask that can mist with medication.”

“Yes.”

“Okay, that’ll do for now, Allura, where is the med bay?”

Allura gasped. “Shiro, his lips, they—they’re turning blue!”

Shiro swore, to Lance’s confused delight. “Come _on_ , Allura, I don’t know where the med bay is!”

“R-right.” Allura tapped down the hallway, and Shiro followed her, still carrying Keith, who was looking up at him in a confused kind of way. “What’s happening to him?”

“He’s having an asthma attack,” Shiro explained, “Probably because—I don’t know, I don’t even remember…”

“A _what_ attack?”

Shiro bolted ahead to the med bay. “I’ll explain later. Where’s your…?” Allura pointed him to a machine, and he set Keith down on a cot. “Keep him sitting upright,” he ordered Allura, and started inputting what he wanted. Halfway through, he froze. What came next? Was he remembering this right? He hadn’t even remembered that Keith was even asthmatic—could he be trusted with this?

Keith wheezed in a final kind of way, and Shiro remembered the rest of the chemical formula, and finally, agonizingly slowly, the machine gave a small whir. Allura attached an oxygen mask with a hose to the machine and strapped it over Keith’s face. Shiro could see something misting out, and after a few minutes, Keith’s wheezing slowly faded back into normal breathing.

Shiro’s knees wobbled, and he collapsed with relief. Keith was going to be okay. Allura gestured to the mask, and he nodded. She took it off, Keith blinking at her in tired confusion.

Shiro staggered back to his feet as the other paladins bounded in. “He’s okay,” Shiro told them, “He’s fine.”

Lance frowned down at Keith. “What was _that_?”

“He has asthma,” Pidge said in a ‘are you an idiot’ tone, “Wasn’t that kind of obvious? You know, when Shiro asked us to make an inhaler?”

Lance lifted his hands. “Okay, okay! Sorry! Geeze…”

Shiro helped Keith up. “Why didn’t you tell me you’d left your inhaler on Earth?”

“Didn’t want to worry you,” Keith muttered, “I didn’t think there was much we could do about it.”

“You still should have let me _know_.”

“Sorry.”

Allura tapped her foot impatiently. “Shiro, you still haven’t told me what an asthma is and how it can attack Keith without us being able to see it! Is it camouflaged? Will it attack the rest of us? How dangerous is it? Can we do anything to defend ourselves from it?”

The paladins all looked at each other and started laughing. Even Keith was laughing, a little bit breathlessly, but still laughing.

“What’s an asthma,” Pidge hooted.

Allura looked at Coran, who had entered behind the paladins. “I don’t know what’s happening!” she cried, “Apparently this ‘asthma’ can attack and nearly _kill_ Keith without warning, and they’re just laughing about it!”

“I would’ve been okay,” Keith said dismissively.

Shiro fixed him with a stern look, pushing away his laughter. “You might not have been.”

Keith held his gaze for a moment, then looked away. “Yeah, okay. Fine. Next time, I’ll tell you. But it just kind of… hit me. Like the gladiator. I think it _was_ the gladiator hitting me, or at least all of the strain of fighting it.”

Allura blinked. “The gladiator… is an asthma?” She looked at Coran. “Do you know what they’re talking about?”

He shook his head. “Not a single clue, Princess.”

Allura frowned. “If the gladiator is an asthma… will we have to stop using it?”

Keith gave her a wry smile. “We can use it. I just have to not get hit by it. I guess that’s motivation to try harder.”

Allura nodded, but she still looked confused. “So… the gladiator _is_ an asthma?” she questioned.

Shiro shook his head. “Asthma is a… condition. I guess Alteans don’t have it, or you have another name for it. It happens on Earth a lot, so we’ve found a way to cope and deal with it so that it won’t stop people from living their lives.”

“Is it contagious?”

“No,” Shiro assured her.

“It’s like near or far-sightedness,” Pidge interjected, pushing up her glasses, “We can fix it really easily with glasses, contacts, or even Lasik. Asthma’s a little more dangerous, though.”

“Ha,” Lance muttered, “Says someone who’s never been in a car with Veronica when she’s forgotten her glasses.”

Shiro shot him a quelling look. “Asthma is… it’s not a constant problem like being near-sighted or far-sighted is, where if you don’t have your glasses, you can tell immediately. Most of the time—well, for Keith, anyway—everything is normal, pretty much.”

“But I have triggers,” Keith interrupted, as if he didn’t want to sit around while Shiro explained him. “Things that set off my asthma. Smoke. And, um… sometimes when I exercise too much. And my—what’s it called—my windpipe or whatever.”

“Bronchial tubes,” Shiro muttered.

“Yeah. Those. They kind of puff up, or tighten or whatever, and it makes breathing hard. And… there’s medication that I can take when I’m having an attack—”

“That’s what I used,” Shiro interjected.

“Yeah. And then there’s medication that I take if I’m having symptoms so that hopefully I won’t even _have_ an attack.” He looked hopefully at Shiro, but Shiro was already shaking his head.

“I’m sorry. I don’t remember what’s in that one. The spare that the doctor gave me was for when you were having an attack. I guess she figured that if you just had symptoms and you couldn’t find your inhaler, you could just go her directly.”

Keith winced. “Okay. I’ll just avoid my triggers, then.”

Allura frowned. “You’re not getting out of paladin training.”

“I’m not trying to. I just…” Keith shrugged. “I’ll just be careful.”

“And take breaks if you need to,” Shiro said. He said it like a suggestion, but he made it clear that it was an order.

Keith shrugged again with a twitchy glance at the other paladins, his cheeks flushing slightly. “Sure.”

 _Oh_ , Shiro realized, _He’s afraid of looking weak around the others. He doesn’t want them to think that he’s less fit than them, or unable to do all of the team bonding exercises. He really **does** want to work with them._ Shiro gave a small sigh. _Oh, Keith_.

“Paladin training is over for today,” Shiro said firmly.

“What?! No!” Keith and Allura said in unison, then looked at each other, surprised.

“Don’t stop it for me,” Keith insisted, “I’m fine now—we can keep going.”

“You five need to be able to fight Zarkon as soon as possible,” Allura agreed, “And if Keith is feeling recovered, then I see no reason not to continue.”

“We’re stopping,” Shiro said firmly, “Allura, we’re _all_ tired, and _all_ of us need a break. Not just Keith. And anyway, I want to make sure that Keith has an inhaler in case anything goes wrong, maybe two if we can figure out the other medication.”

Keith was burning a brighter scarlet by the second. “I’ll be _fine_ ,” he repeated.

“Ooo, I vote stopping and working on the inhaler,” Hunk offered, “Is that an option? Yes, please. Please, let’s stop and work on the inhaler.”

Lance stretched. “Sounds good to me.”

Allura shot them both a withering glare. “Keith says he’s fine, so we should continue,” she insisted.

Coran clapped his hands. “Oh! The asthma! That’s probably why his breathing sounded off, Princess!”

Keith’s face was now roughly the color of his armor. “My breathing is not _off_ ,” he snapped.

Allura nodded. “You’re right! Well, that’s a relief. I thought something might be seriously wrong, but if it’s as easily dealt with as Shiro implied…”

“What do you _mean_ , my breathing is off?”

“I want to stop to work on the inhaler,” Hunk offered again.

“And I can research for the preventative medication,” Pidge piped up, “Maybe we can find out how to make it ourselves!”

Just when Shiro thought that Keith couldn’t get any redder, he did. “I don’t need it! Not right now! We can finish the training!”

Shiro whistled to get everyone’s attention. “Hey! Paladins! Pay attention! Allura, we’re stopping the training session. We’re taking a break. Voltron will have to wait.”

“Voltron has been waiting for over ten-thousand years!”

“Then it can wait one more day,” Shiro said coolly. He stared Allura in the eye, and she glared back. Keith was still getting redder, his ears and neck also flushed.

Allura was the first to back down. “Fine,” she snapped, “But you’ll be working twice as hard tomorrow!”

She whirled out of the room with Coran, and Pidge and Hunk followed, although they were talking about the engineering of an inhaler. Shiro didn’t think it could possibly be that difficult, but apparently, it was. Lance wandered out after them, and Keith whirled around to face Shiro.

“Why did you do that?!”

Shiro raised one eyebrow. “Do what?”

Keith paced angrily. “Why did you make us stop for me?!”

“Keith, we’re all tired, and we all need a break. You saw that we were getting nowhere.”

“You’ve never lied to me before, Shiro, don’t start now. Why did you do that?!”

“Keith—”

“I can _handle myself_ , Shiro! I _have been_ handling myself, out in the desert, by myself! I know my limits! I know what I can do! The gladiator caught me by surprise, but otherwise, I’m _fine_!”

“I just thought…”

“What? That everything can go back exactly as it was? That it would be you, taking care of me, like when I was a cadet?”

“Well…” Shiro kind of… _had_ thought that. Time had passed, he knew that, but he’d hoped… but Keith was older, now. “We’re part of a team, now, Keith. We’ve got to watch each other’s backs.”

“Right. And how about how we look to the others?! How about the fact that you just…” Keith clammed up.

“That I just what?” Shiro prodded gently.

“That you just—you treated me like a baby! You didn’t listen to what I had to say, you just completely ignored me—I was _fine_! I could have gone on, I could have kept training! But now, now what? Now everyone thinks that I’ve got to be coddled, don’t they? They think that I’m going to just… I don’t know, shatter or something if they push too hard! And I don’t want that, Shiro! I want to push myself, but I can’t if you’re trying to hold me back!”

Shiro blinked, resisting the urge to take a step back. “I…”

“Just… trust me, okay, Shiro? I know what I’m doing. I trust _you_ : is it too much to ask that you trust me in return?”

A wave of guilt swept over Shiro. Keith had grown—he was still reckless, if the stunt he’d pulled while getting the red lion was any indication, but he wasn’t helpless. He could take care of himself, and no matter how much Shiro wanted to protect him—he had to let go. He had to let Keith be an adult. A paladin.

“Alright,” Shiro said quietly, “I trust you. But you said you trust me—and that means sometimes _I’m_ right too, okay? You were right today. I see that. I see that you could have kept going. And I’m sorry. I was wrong to stop all of us because I thought that you might not be able to keep up when you could. But sometimes… sometimes you _don’t_ know your own limits.”

Keith gave him a guilty look. “Yes, Sir.”

“We’ll watch each other, okay?” Shiro suggested, “Like you said, that’s part of being a team, right?”

Keith gave him a smile. “Right.”

“Right. So, you watch that I don’t try to baby you, and I’ll watch that you don’t push yourself too hard trying to prove that you’re _not_ a baby.” Shiro offered a hand. “Deal?”

After a moment of hesitation, Keith shook the hand. “Deal.”


	3. Team

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the wait, I was camping, and then I didn't want to write, but here we are.

Pidge handed Keith two cylinders, Lance and Hunk behind her. “Well, there you are. Took about five minutes to find the preventative medicine, which you’d think that whoever makes it would keep a little quieter about, I mean, any idiot with a chemistry set could make this—”

Keith sincerely doubted that.

“—but anyway, that should do it, if you start feeling weird, tell me, because, you know, the Internet might not be the best source for finding the chemical compounds of medicine.”

“Should I be worried?”

“Nah, I’m sure it’s fine. Should be.” Pidge squinted at him, as if imagining all of the ways things could go wrong. “You’ll be okay. Probably.”

“Quick question, am I your guinea pig?”

“What? No!” Pidge protested quickly, “I would _never_ use you as a guinea pig! Hunk wouldn’t _ever_ let that happen.”

Hunk nodded. “Never.”

Keith looked at Pidge for a minute, not feeling particularly assured. “Okay. Let’s find Allura and Shiro.”

“Uh, we don’t have to do that just yet,” Hunk said quickly, “I mean, hypothetically, it should have taken longer to make the inhaler, so we have some time, right? We don’t have to start up training right away, really, we should take some time off.”

Keith shook his head. “You are _not_ using me as an excuse to get out of training!”

“Too late, Shiro already did,” Pidge muttered, “Look, Keith, what Shiro said yesterday was true. Allura pushed us too hard. We need a break.”

“I’m getting Shiro.”

“Oh, come on,” Lance protested, “We’re supposed to be a team, and teams mean we do votes! All in favor of not continuing training?”

Pidge, Hunk and Lance all raised their hands.

Lance nodded, as if that proved everything. “There, see? Majority decides no. You’ve got to abide by the group decision, Keith. Hey—where are you going?”

Keith marched away, “I’m not listening to the group decision,” he called back, “I’m a discipline case, remember?”

He found Shiro on the training deck, fighting the gladiator bot. “What was that about taking a break?”

Shiro laughed. “End training sequence.” The bot dissolved into coding, and Shiro wiped a sheen of sweat from his forehead. “Alright, you’ve exposed me as a hypocrite. I just figured I should take the time off to improve as an individual. If I’m good enough at fighting, I can protect the rest of you in a pinch, if we can’t work together as a team.”

Keith shook his head. “You know that won’t work.”

“You don’t know that.”

“You remember what they always said at the Garrison, when we were doing team exercises?”

“A chain is only as strong as its weakest link, I know, Keith, but that doesn’t mean that the other links can’t help the weakest one. We’re humans, not bits of metal, Keith. We can change and support each other, rather than always relying on someone else to be stronger.”

“If you say so.”

“What’s on your mind?”

“The other paladins don’t want to train.” Keith held up his inhalers. “They tried to convince me not to come and get you.”

Shiro shrugged. “They’re a bunch of teenagers. They’ll do it, though, if we tell them to. They’ve been trained to take orders.”

“I’m a teenager too, Shiro.”

Shiro paused. “Yeah. You are. But you’re not…”

“Like them? Thanks, Shiro, I needed the reminder.” Keith was surprised by the bitterness in his voice. He hadn’t talked to Shiro like that since… since he’d been new at the Garrison, and always getting into fights.

“No, Keith, not like that—you’re tougher, is all, more used to doing hard work. The Garrison training is hard, but they’ve gotten used to the breaks that they get, and everything being there for them when they wanted or needed it. You—you got used to providing for yourself and never stopping doing what needed to be done because you always had to be ready for a time when you would have a harder time getting what you needed.” Keith thought he detected a note of sadness in Shiro’s voice, but his friend moved on. “They’ll adjust, don’t worry. But not if we keep letting them take breaks. Come on, let’s go get Allura.”

Keith wondered if Shiro had been talking about himself, as well as Keith, because it had been too close to life in the desert for Shiro to have guessed. He’d had to hunt for food—or get prickly pears, when they were ripe, or, if all else failed, eat cactus pads themselves. He’d made hoverbike repairs himself, had repaired anything broken in his house by himself—he’d had to keep looking for food in case he couldn’t find any later, had to learn how to can or jar or dry food so that he could eat it when he couldn’t find anything in the desert.

Shiro wouldn’t have done any of those things, of course, but surviving in the Galra arenas must have been worse than his own time in the desert.

“Allura, we’re ready to start again,” Shiro said into the coms.

“We’ll begin training again soon, Shiro, but the prisoners that you and Pidge rescued are waking up—and I doubt that Pidge will be able to focus on training.”

“I should be there,” Shiro said immediately, “Keith, you round up everyone else and get them headed to the training deck.”

He disappeared down the hallways, leaving Keith alone with the princess. Something started blaring, and Allura pulled up a screen with security footage.

Keith frowned, squinting over her shoulder. “What’s that?”

“We’re having a security alert,” Allura informed him, “One of the natives is approaching the castle. He’s… not great at stealth.”

Keith pulled out his bayard. “You never know…”

Allura put a hand out to stop him. “No. Alteans believe in peace first. Let’s go welcome them.”

 _Alteans believe in peace first_? Keith thought, _Is that why you immediately attacked Lance once you were out of the pod_?

Of course, he understood the sentiment of wanting to deck Lance in the face on first acquaintance.

Allura swept towards the doors with a diplomatic smile, but Keith kept his bayard out, just in case. Allura seemed to think that the locals were harmless, but that thing had a _spear_. He wasn’t planning on letting their wormhole-maker get shish-kebabed.

Xxx

Keith watched impassively as a tiny Arusian performed some kind of dance, wondering why he had to be here. Then Allura began waxing on about Voltron, and it suddenly made sense. He was a showpiece. Great. His favorite thing to be.

Allura finished her pretty speech, and the Arusians cheered. Keith stifled a yawn, and then one of the Arusians launched itself at him, wrapping its arms around his. Keith tensed, and then felt a deep calm feeling, a _loved_ feeling, spread through him. He wondered if it was an Arusian superpower.

“I don’t usually hug strangers…” the _loved_ feeling increased. “But, uh— _man,_ you are cuddly.”

“Thank you.”

Keith’s eyes widened, and an uncomfortable feeling started combating the cushy cuddly feelings. He didn’t know what he’d expected, but it certainly hadn’t been a voice that deep. It was a _little bit_ creepy, actually.

Everyone else seemed to be enjoying themselves, though. Hunk was trying new foods. He wasn’t sure what exactly Lance was up to, but he was smiling, so it must be fun. Allura was talking to everyone, of course. The Arusian had detached and had wandered off, probably to spread cuddles to someone else. The ground started to rumble, and Keith looked up at the sky.

A giant cruiser—if it even was that—was bearing down on them. Arusians started to scream.

“Oh, no.”

Xxx

“Form Voltron!” Shiro called as they circled a massive robot—beast—whatever the giant metal creature they now faced was.

They flew up into the sky in tight formation.

Nothing happened.

Keith swore.

“Keith!” Shiro said in a shocked voice, while Lance laughed.

“Sorry,” Keith said, even though he wasn’t, “Alright, so we don’t have a strong enough bond to form Voltron, now what do we do, Shiro?”

Keith wondered if anyone else heard Shiro gulp. “We’ll just have to try to attack in the lions.”

“We tried that already!” Hunk yelped, “It kicked our butts!”

The monster threw another energy ball at them, and they dodged, barely.

“Someone’s gotta take out that weapon,” Keith growled.

“Too dangerous,” Shiro immediately, “Even if any of us could get through, that thing is fast with its weapon. It’ll take them down in a heartbeat.”

“Not if you’re in the fastest lion.”

“Keith, no!”

Keith was already moving, urging his lion to move faster, looping around an energy ball, diving to avoid its return. _Feel the bond_.

“Now or never, Red,” he muttered, and they took the dive, headed straight for the barrel of the monster’s weapon. A jaw-blade formed.

“Keith, pull back!” When Keith didn’t, the order changed. “Lance, Pidge, cover him. Try to keep its attention off of Keith. Hunk, you and I are going for the legs—if we can knock it off balance, then it won’t be able to retaliate. Go, go, go!”

Blue lasers fired, but Keith’s attention was fully on the monster’s energy torch. “It’s my fault we couldn’t keep training,” he said out loud, “Which means it’s my fault we can’t form Voltron. That’s why I have to do this, Shiro. Also, I’m the fastest,” he added as an afterthought, and, dodging one more swipe so that he was too close for the monster to hit him. He jammed the jaw-blade into the weapon, and a power surge jolted out from it, cackling through his lion.

One massive arm from the monster caught his lion and threw it into a mountain. Keith was nearly jolted out of his seat, and he bit his tongue on accident, his head jerked around.

“Ow…”

“—eith! Keith!”

Keith realized that Shiro was shouting his name through the helmet coms, and he shook his head, clearing it. “Here.” He spit out blood from biting his tongue. “I’m alright.” He moved his lion’s controls, but nothing happened. “Oh, no.” None of the displays were lit up—the entire lion was dark. “No, no, no!”

“What is it?”

“My lion’s not responding—I think the power surge from that monster knocked it out.”

This time, _Shiro_ swore. “Sorry. What you did worked, the weapon’s down, but—” Shiro grunted. “It’s still big, and it’s still getting hits in on us.”

“It’s going for Keith!” Hunk shrieked, and sure enough, through the windows, Keith could see the ogre thing stomping towards him.

“Keith, get out of there!” Shiro ordered.

Keith got out of the pilot seat, but none of the hatches were working—all of them needed power to open. “Not an option. I’m stuck in here.”

“Defensive formation,” Shiro ordered, “Keep that thing away from Keith—he’s a sitting duck right now.”

The lions flew around the ogre’s head, blasting it with their lasers. As Keith watched, the green lion was swatted away, but Pidge came back to the fight quickly.

“Come on,” Keith urged his lion, pushing fruitlessly on the controls, “We’ve got to help them! They need us! We have to form Voltron!”

There was a faint noise in the back of his head, like a tired growl, and Keith shouted in rage as the black lion was seized in the monster’s grip. “Come _on_! We’re supposed to be a team! We’ve got to have their backs!”

The faint growl turned to a _roar_ , and everything around him powered up. The console lit up, and Keith heard answering roars from the other lions.

On the coms screen, Keith saw Hunk look at his lion. “Guys? Do you think…”

“Definitely feeling it,” Lance agreed.

Keith shot out of the mountain with a burst of extra speed from his lion and sliced through the arm holding Shiro. Shiro shot up, and all of them fell instinctively into formation, as if they’d planned this.

“Here we go,” Shiro ordered, his voice clear and loud, “Form Voltron!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just so you know, I'm taking a bit of a hiatus until august, because I need to take a step back and actually PLAN what I'm doing and write something that isn't filler (this chapter was kind of filler) as opposed to what I did starting this, which was jump in shouting WHEEEE, ADVENTURE in my head, if not out loud.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, yikes, sorry this took so long!

Keith surveyed the burning Arusian village, his mind racing. Everything had been just fine—a party, nothing but Arusians as far as the eye could see, and then there had been explosions, and panicked Arusians running everywhere, and Lance had been in a coma—he’d felt so _useless_ , because Hunk was leaving, and he couldn’t stay with a charred body, even a living one, because…

Keith swallowed hard. They’d tried to cover his eyes, but he’d seen his dad’s body anyway, charred, blackened—but he had to focus. The village was burning. They’d gotten lax, let their guard down, and, of course, something like this had happened.

His eye caught on a metal form in the fire, and his heart sank. “Oh, no.” This wasn’t an accident.

Allura’s eyes moved frantically over the fire-consumed village. “What’s happening?” The Arusians behind her echoed the sentiment.

“Look. Attackers.” Keith pointed to the sentries. “I’ll go in for a closer look. Stay here with them.” He nodded to the frightened Arusians.

“Keith!”

Keith ignored Allura and slid down into the burning village, sword out. Fire was everywhere, and his hands ached with the memory of burns. Keith snuck closer to the sentries, trying not to breathe in the smoke, and as he watched, one of the sentries toppled over.

“What?!” Keith blinked in surprise, accidentally inhaling smoke. He coughed, and took a puff on his inhaler. _Not now_.

The other sentries toppled over, oblivious to the noise he was making. His blood turned to ice. “Oh, no.”

He activated his coms as he ran back towards where he’d left Allura and the villagers. “They tricked us! It was just a diversion to separate us and thin the Castle defenses!”

He stumbled out of the fire, coughing, and Allura grabbed his arm. “Keith, are you alright?”

“I’m fine. We need to get back to the Castle, _now_!”

“But the smoke—you said it was a trigger—”

“I said I’m fine, come on!”

Keith sprinted back towards the Castle, Allura behind him. His breath started to hitch in his chest, his lungs still aching from the smoke. As they approached the Castle, the particle barrier started to ripple into place. They reached the castle just as the barrier finished.

“We’re too late!”

“No! They’re taking control of the Castle! They’re taking Voltron!”

Keith pushed on the barrier. “Can we break through the barrier?”

“No. And whoever has taken the Castle has a crystal, which means that they’ll be able to fly the ship. We have to stop them!”

Keith frowned at the problematic barrier, still panting from the run. Allura gave him a look.

“Keith, are you sure that you’re alright?”

“I’m fine,” he said shortly, “We need to worry about getting in.”

His helmet crackled to life. “Keith? Can you hear me?”

Allura’s face lit up, and her earrings started to glow. Keith continued to examine the barrier as she talked to Pidge, hitting it experimentally with his sword. It bounced off, and Keith yelped at the rebound, the sword clattering out of his grip. He kicked the barrier. Yeah, he wasn’t busting through it any time soon.

Allura finished what she was telling Pidge and turned the com off, turning to Keith. “Pidge will shut down the particle barrier so that we can get in.”

Keith had been half-listening, but he’d thought he’d heard someone else’s name. “Good. How are Shiro and Lance?”

Allura shrugged helplessly. “I’m sorry Keith.”

“No—no, they—they’re—”

“Captured, Keith. I’m sorry. We’ll get them back, we just need…”

“What if Pidge gets captured, too? What’s our plan then?”

“I—I don’t know.”

Keith started to pace. “You’re sure there’s not a weak spot on the barrier? Anywhere that we could get in?”

“I don’t think so. It’s an even barrier—each part is as strong as the next.”

“So, what, if Pidge gets captured, that’s it, game over, Zarkon has the lions?”

“No—no, we can’t let that happen. Hunk and Coran are out there with a pod—if they come back in time—”

“They’ve only got one pod with no weapons.”

“I know, but we might be able to get help.”

“From who?”

Allura didn’t answer.

“We’re alone in this, aren’t we? It was always just us—well, us and the Arusians, but they don’t have the firepower to get through the barrier. So we can’t count on any outside help. We have to have a backup plan just in case.”

“Like what? What can we do? We can’t get through the particle barrier on our own!”

Frustration welled up in the back of Keith’s throat. “I—I don’t know, but we can’t just sit here and watch the Galra make off with the universe’s only hope!” He slammed a fist into the barrier, wincing afterwards. It was like punching a brick wall.

Allura sighed. “Keith, I’m sorry.” She held out a placating hand. “Just… Calm down please. If you hit the barrier too many times, it’ll give an alert to the Galra.”

Inspiration hit Keith like a thunderbolt. “But then they’d come out to see what it was, right? And they’d have to open the particle barrier!”

“Yes, or maybe they’d just blast us with the Castle’s weapons while they stayed nice and cozy inside of the particle barrier.”

“Oh.”

“Right. Let’s not try it. Pidge will pull through for us.”

“Or she’ll get in a pod and get far away from us so that she can find her family.”

“Pidge wouldn’t—” Allura stopped mid-sentence. “How did you know that Pidge was a girl?”

Keith shut his mouth. “Whoops. I figured she didn’t want anyone to know.”

“The mice told me. I don’t know how they found out. But how did _you_ know?”

“I—well—” Keith blushed scarlet. “When you first gave us the paladin armor, she wouldn’t change into her flight suit in the same room as the rest of us.”

“And you followed her anyway?” Allura asked, scandalized.

“No! No, I didn’t, I just thought it was kind of weird, and so I figured that—y’know, coupled with her really high-pitched scream and the fact that she kept a diary that, well, she was a girl. Plus, she said she was a Holt, and I remembered Shiro telling me that his flight commander had a younger daughter, but he never said anything about a younger son, so…” Keith trailed off. “I think Shiro knows.”

“What?”

“I mean, if I figured it out, then he probably did too—he would’ve known about the family lives of his crew better than me. And… he went to talk to Pidge alone the other day. I think he was confronting her about it.”

“Do you think anyone else knows?”

“Hunk, probably. He read her diary, and he spends the most time with her. I don’t know about Coran. Lance… probably not.”

Allura frowned. “Didn’t they know each other before Voltron? Surely he would have noticed!” Keith raised an eyebrow at her, and she sighed. “I hear myself. So, Lance doesn’t know. Coran may or may not know. Does Pidge know that any of us know?”

“Probably not.” Keith crossed his arms. “Doesn’t matter, anyway, because the first shot she gets, she’s out of here.”

“Keith?”

“Why would she do that? Just leave us? The universe needs her, and she’s just going to leave it?”

“Keith, wouldn’t you do the same for _your_ family?”

Keith stiffened. “My dad is dead,” he said tersely, “And if my mother were captured by the Galra, I wouldn’t leave the universe’s only hope to get her.”

Allura reeled back. “Oh! I’m so sorry! I thought—I didn’t know—I assumed you had family on Earth like the others. Your mother—”

“She left when I was a baby,” Keith said dismissively, “I don’t even remember her. It’s fine, I just—I wouldn’t leave Voltron to rescue her, even if I knew who she was and where she was. The best way to help her would be to defeat the Galra from Voltron, anyway.”

“She… left?”

“Yeah.”

“What do you mean?”

Keith crossed his arms. “I mean, she left, abandoned us, never came back.”

“Oh, my,” Allura said faintly, “I didn’t mean to—”

“It’s fine, Allura.”

Allura’s eyes lit up with understanding. “Oh! That’s why you hate that Pidge is leaving! Because Pidge leaving reminds you of your mother leaving! Because she’s leaving something that should be important to her, but apparently isn’t enough to keep her around!”

Keith broke away abruptly. “I’m going to do a perimeter around the Castle, just in case there’s a weak point.”

“I’ll come—”

“No, you stay here. One of us needs to stay stationary and give Pidge directions, and I don’t know how the Castle works.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Keith’s tone left no room for argument, and he stalked off on his own, prodding at the offending particle barrier, looking for a spot where maybe, just maybe, there would be a spot to break in. He felt a whirlwind of emotions swirling inside of him.

Was that why he had argued so vehemently that Pidge must stay? Was Allura right, and he was seeing his mother leaving them? Had he maybe, just a little bit, become attached to the team, and didn’t want to see any of them go?

 _Stars, I’m so **needy**_.

Keith laughed bitterly to himself. “Needy” wasn’t a word that typically applied to him—he was used to being on his own, to providing for himself, to being tough. He hadn’t ever _needed_ anyone. But now? Now that maybe, just maybe, he had a team? He couldn’t watch them leave.

“Stupid,” he muttered, looking up at the particle barrier, “Stupid, stupid, _stupid_!”

He shouldn’t have been such an idiot. He should’ve known that between Hunk, Lance and Pidge, all of whom were soft, who had families, at least _one_ of them would want to leave. He shouldn’t have expected that they would want to stay.

Maybe if he’d tried harder—was it his fault, for pushing them away? He’d pushed _them_ away so that they wouldn’t push _him_ away, but he’d thought… earlier, he and Hunk had been laughing, had been poking at Lance after he’d collapsed from the Nunvil—stars, he’d made an idiot of himself trying to drink the stupid Nunvil even after he watched Lance choke on it. And for what? Hunk had said that he wanted to go home, and Lance had seemed homesick as well. Had they just been _laughing_ at him, planning to leave and pretending to be his friends while he did dumb things, the whole time planning to go home and leave him up in space with a couple of aliens?

Once he was sure he was far enough from Allura, he screamed, slamming one fist into the particle barrier. He’d thought he was adaptable. Able to roll with the punches. But the entire team was falling apart, and he couldn’t do anything to stop it. He couldn’t keep any of them here. He was losing control of the situation.

At least Shiro would stay. Shiro wouldn’t go back to Earth. Of course, that was assuming that they ever got the _stars-blasted particle barrier open_! Keith stabbed the barrier with his sword for good measure. It rippled, and then he heard a high whine that he had learned to associate with laser cannons.

“Oh, no.”

The Castle fired on him, and he barely managed to throw himself to the ground to avoid the massive beam. Still, the shockwave sent him flying backwards, and he rolled to absorb the impact as he hit the ground.

Allura’s voice crackled over the com. “Keith? What’s going on?”

“I activated the Castle defenses.”

“What?!”

“I hit the barrier too hard. They’re firing. I’m fine, don’t worry.”

“Readings from your suit imply that your heart rate is accelerated, and your breathing—”

“My breathing is fine!” Keith took a puff on his inhaler. “They’ve stopped firing. They probably think I’m—”

The laser began its charging whine again, and Keith swore, freezing in place. If he moved, they’d see him for sure. If he held absolutely still, they might miss him—he was a small target, and it was dark.

The laser barreled towards him, and he ducked to the side at the last minute, wincing as he was flung away again.

“Keith, the Castle has infrared as well as normal cameras! You can’t hide, just see if you can dodge them and get out of range. Why did you have to trigger the alarms?”

“Well, think of it this way,” Keith told her as he ran in a looping, zigzagging pattern to throw off lasers, “They’ll be too focused on me to notice Pidge.”

“Pidge destroyed the mainframe. I don’t think they’ll stop noticing her.”

The lasers finally stopped firing, and Keith made his way back to Allura. “What’s going on?”

“I’ve made contact with the mice! They’re going to help Pidge!”

“What are they going to—?”

The particle barrier shut down.

“Alright!”

Keith sprinted into the castle, puffing. _Have to make it, have to make it, have to **make it**_!

He burst into the control room to see Pidge fighting Sendak, Shiro tied up and Lance still in a coma. Keith lunged towards Sendak, but was batted away like he was nothing. He wheezed for air, already short of breath from the run.

 _Stars, no! Not now_!

Shiro also tried to take down the Galra, but with his arms tied, he was batted aside even more easily than Keith. Sendak grabbed Pidge, and Keith wanted to _scream_ , but he didn’t have his breath, and his _stupid fingers_ didn’t seem able to _open his belt pouch_!

 _Stupid, stupid, stupid_!

Pidge yelled, and then a shot rang out, hitting Sendak in the arm. He yelled and dropped Pidge as Lance slumped back to the ground.

 _Now, now, now_!

Keith launched himself to his feet, his vision going spotty from lack of air. He lunged towards Sendak, giving him a beautiful uppercut and knocking him backwards. Keith dropped down, trying to open his belt pouches as his vision started to fade permanently into black.

Small hands pushed the inhaler at him, and he took a puff, gasping and trying to regain the breath he’d lost as the medicine began to take effect and his chest eased up. He slumped against the wall. “Did—we—do it?”

Pidge nodded. “You and Lance.”

“Oh—right—good—you okay?”

“Yeah. Fine. Thanks to you and Lance.

Keith nodded, leaning his head back. _Stars_ , that was hitting him hard. Pidge chuckled softly.

“The very picture of victory.”

“Are you—going to leave?”

Pidge hesitated. “I—No. I’m going to stick around, don’t worry.”

Keith started to close his eyes, exhausted after the attack. “Mm. Thanks… Katie.”

The last thing he saw before his eyes slid shut was her shocked face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is like, a lot harder to write than I thought it would be, so updates are probably going to be very, VERY slow.


End file.
